Thursday, December 29, 2005
Christmas loot report.
What do you get a magazine editor for Christmas? Why, The Complete New Yorker on disc, of course! What a cool and time-consuming present. Thanks, Santa. Mrs P gave me Kieslowski's Three Colors trilogy — three of my favorite movies. Her sister set me up with the Clap Your Hands Say Yeah CD, which is undeniably cool. Thanks for the loot!
And, because Christmas just isn't the same without a good bit of religious kitsch, thanks to my wife I'm now the proud owner of the Choose Your Religion Wheel O' Wisdom — from a line of "cordless search engines for life." The handy wheel describes and lists perks, drawbacks, accessories, afterlife promises, and potential new friends for 30 "world religions" (including Voodoo, consumerism, and snake handlers).
How is Unitarian Universalism presented to the savvy convert? The wheel describes the religion as "socially liberal, creedless, inclusive. Traces to Reformation. Unity of God (anti-trinity) & universality of salvation. Experience, conscience, & reason inform faith; ethical living is way to worship." Not bad. Accessories? "Flowers to exchange in God's love during services." Okay, but flower communion is really just once a year. Afterlife promises? "Human understanding of life & death is never final." How true. Potential new friends? 629,000 — reflecting the number of people who self-identified as UUs in a national survey a few years back, although only one-third of 'em go to church. Perks? "Accepting, compassionate. Can be ordained in time for friends' weddings. Supports gay/lesbian marriage." Whoa: You can't get yourself ordained a UU minister in a hurry; that's the Universal Life Church. But the best thing about the wheel is its list of drawbacks to Unitarian Universalism: "Nickname is UUs or UUism. Old marketing slogan: 'I was a Unitarian all along & never knew it.'" Yeah, being part of the "yooyoo" religion has always bugged me, too.
Copyright © 2005 by Philocrites | Posted 29 December 2005 at 10:13 PM